Tense Writing

While reading various articles and doing research, I frequently come across business writing and web items that I think I can write better. I'm a proofreader and editor, it's what I do! When trying to write for business or any other sort of correspondence, it is important to maintain a consistent voice. One mistake I find on a regular basis is when web designers do not maintain a common tense. I think the mistake of switching tense is often made when a writer is trying to keep the tone of the text casual. Or, a writer might misuse tense by trying to keep the same tense. A few tips can be pulled from these examples to get you on your way to writing better business correspondence.

This example is pulled from the biography of a professional:

XYZ Company was founded in 2005 by Jane Doe. Ms. Doe's mission was to assist companies in achieving their strategic business goals.

In trying to be consistent, this writer has made an error in tense. The word "was" indicates that particular mission is in the past, which therefore, implies her mission has changed. If the mission has not changed, the sentence should be revised. One option is:

Ms. Jane Doe founded XYZ Company in 2005, with the continuing mission to assist companies in achieve their strategic business goals.

However, aren't most companies goals business related? Is it necessary to spell out "business goals?"

The XYZ Company was founded in 2005 by Ms. Jane Doe. XYZ's strategy is based on Ms. Jane Doe's mission to guide companies as they realize their goals.

If someone has to read something more than once to understand what it means, rewrite it for clarification.

We accept a 25% - 50% up front payment after agreement of project scope and terms, remaining balance is due upon successful completion, unless other terms have been arranged.

Three separate clauses are awkward and have to be re-read in order to be properly understood.

Rewritten:
When the client and our firm have reached an agreement on the project’s scope and terms, we expect a 25% to 50% payment before work begins. The remaining balance is due upon completion. Any other arrangement of terms will be written into the contract. We find this protects your interests, and ours.

Detailed Service Description
Passionate professionals who use the power of the written word to help you achieve your objectives.
Just because there is a header, doesn’t mean the sentence below it shouldn’t be capable of standing alone.
Rewritten:
Our services are provided by passionate professionals using the power of the written word, to help you achieve your objectives.


Obviously, a casual and conversational tone works very well and is expected in certain circumstances. Formal language and technical verbiage can appear snobbish, and frankly, it can look as if the writer is working too hard to prove they know big words. Appearing erudite is not necessarily a bad thing, when it's shown in small doses. – wdw.